On my post, Transracial Adoption Video, someone asked a question in the comments. What is the right kind of exposure and when is it enough exposure? I’m back to my time honored answer of “I wish I knew the answer.” I’ve said in many of my past posts that I wish I knew where to find the manual, but the ultimate problem is always going to be that it depends on the adoptee.

I did not grow up in an area that had a Korean community. In fact, where I grew up there was no minority community at all. So, my parents had to import their information in the form of books (mostly because I loved them) and cultural outings.

In my case, cultural outings were really “cultural” and not “Korean cultural.” My parents were really equal opportunity culture educators and I went to see all different kinds of events. Considering my father’s line of work (U.S. historical reenactment), I have to say that I was probably more exposed to the Native American culture than any others. Though, I think that Irish culture takes a close second. I was absolutely fascinated by the fact that my mother’s grandparents emigrated from Ireland and that Ireland was full of stories about gods, fairies and magic. I also saw ancient Japanese exhibits at the museum, tried my hand at calligraphy (Parents beware of black ink!), etc…

It was difficult to come across Korean things when I was little. The age of the internet has changed that. My parents searched high and low for a Korean doll for me and found a hanbok for my red-haired Cabbage Patch Kid. Personally, I would not have enjoyed a Korean culture camp (but I would not have enjoyed any kind of camp). My parents asked me if I was interested, but I never took them up on it.

I’ve read posts by Korean adoptees who rail against their parents for not doing more, sending them to camps, to Korean schools, etc… and then there are adoptees like me who were happy with the acknowledgement that we are Korean without the hoopla. As with all things, I think that the key is exposing your child to their culture with whatever resources you have available and, if your child shows a need for more, than you have to put a little more effort into giving them the exposure that they seek. Most importantly, your adoptee needs to know that they can make the request for more without fear of hurting your feelings or outright rejection.

If you would like to comment, but not on this site, please e-mail me at adoptkoreablog@adoptionmail.com.