While I was able to participate from the beginning in my sister’s adoption, I am well aware that my own parenting situation will be a little different. My son will be four (or five) when we are ready to start the process. My son will be able to grasp more than he can now (at three), but some of the process will still be hard for him to understand.

At four or five, the endless paperwork and the doctor’s appointments will seem boring. The need for immediate gratification will override any logical statements from his parents. I can’t even begin imagining the need to try to explain it to him now, though since he asked for a baby for Christmas – he might surprise me.

Right now, I think we’re going to start seriously talking to him about a sibling shortly before the homestudy. Depending on his personality, we may start earlier. We may even mention it in vague terms so that he gets used to the idea. We’re actually planning a big trip right before we start the main part of the process. I guess you might call it a last hurrah.

I am hesitant to make too many plans because I’ve learned over the past two and a half years that my son has his own distinct personality. I suspect that if I made too many plans, I would be forced to adjust them at the last minute anyway. I do know a couple of things that I am already keeping in mind.

1. I don’t want to surprise him.
2. I also don’t want to tell him too early. If you think the wait is long, imagine what it’s like for someone who has no concept of the passage of time?
3. I want to make sure he has all the information that he needs.

If you would like to comment, but not on this site, please e-mail me at adoptkoreablog@adoptionmail.com.
While I was able to participate from the beginning in my sister’s adoption, I am well aware that my own parenting situation will be a little different. My son will be four (or five) when we are ready to start the process. My son will be able to grasp more than he can now (at three), but some of the process will still be hard for him to understand.

At four or five, the endless paperwork and the doctor’s appointments will seem boring. The need for immediate gratification will override any logical statements from his parents. I can’t even begin imagining the need to try to explain it to him now, though since he asked for a baby for Christmas – he might surprise me.

Right now, I think we’re going to start seriously talking to him about a sibling shortly before the homestudy. Depending on his personality, we may start earlier. We may even mention it in vague terms so that he gets used to the idea. We’re actually planning a big trip right before we start the main part of the process. I guess you might call it a last hurrah.

I am hesitant to make too many plans because I’ve learned over the past two and a half years that my son has his own distinct personality. I suspect that if I made too many plans, I would be forced to adjust them at the last minute anyway. I do know a couple of things that I am already keeping in mind.

1. I don’t want to surprise him.
2. I also don’t want to tell him too early. If you think the wait is long, imagine what it’s like for someone who has no concept of the passage of time?
3. I want to make sure he has all the information that he needs.

If you would like to comment, but not on this site, please e-mail me at adoptkoreablog@adoptionmail.com.