The truth is that there is no single way that you should celebrate Arrival Days (or whatever you want to call them). The more accurate title for this post should have been “How to decide how your families want to celebrate Arrival Day”. However, I don’t think that would have fit.

Do you want a huge celebration like in Anne Tyler’s book Digging to America?
Do you want to keep it as a small family event?
Do you want to celebrate the day at all?

Each way is valid. This year, we’re going to be throwing my son a kid party in September or October. His birthday is in December and things are just too crazed during the holidays. He’s been invited to a half a dozen kid parties in the last few months and he’s been asking me when he can have his party. Because my son’s arrival day is in June, I considered throwing him a party then. It made a sense and then this weird non-birthday party would have a theme, but I decided not to do it.

I decided not to do it for a couple of reasons. First, I started wondering how my son would feel about the tradition in five years or ten years. What if he doesn’t like me announcing his adoption to the world? Some children are very private. Private does not mean that you don’t like being adopted; it just means that you may not think that everyone needs to know your business. Second, I like our little family outings – with just myself, my husband and my son. It seems more personal that way. In the past we’ve gone to the zoo. This year, we’re thinking about getting tickets to Thomas the Train at the theater.

The last question is also entirely valid. Why do you really have to celebrate the day? If you celebrate family every day, there is really no reason to celebrate an extra day. I get that. Truthfully, I think it’s the reason that I didn’t really notice when we stopped celebrating my arrival. Despite that, it’s a tradition that I’ll give my son for awhile and then he can decide if it’s necessary or not.